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Well here it is a new year, and I haven’t written anything in just over a month…not for a lack of ideas but because of lack of inspiration. Now before you question the difference, let me explain my take on this dilemma: I have ideas all the time, but sometimes lack the words to adequately explain them without sounding like I am telling you how it is or should be, and I never want this little blog to sound like I am forcing my opinions on anyone.

Finally, I got inspired to be honest with you about my thoughts and plans for myself, in this brand new year and beyond.

There are many things that bother me about people’s behaviours. (All people but not all the time, just every now and then, we all can do these things and I definitely include myself when I say, “all people”.) And so I write not to complain about others but to draw my attention to what I consider to be my own shortcomings, and my resolution to put my best attempt into making efforts to change the things that I don’t like about myself.

1)      Be my word…

It has always bothered me when anyone says something just to satisfy the other person without meaning what they have said. As far as I can tell we are only as good as our word, but often people will say things just to end a conversation that they don’t want, or with good intent on doing something but then never following through (whether it be an offer of help or a promise to not repeat a behaviour that they have apologized for and then shortly after disregarded). I don’t want to be a person who says all the right things at the right times and then forgets about the conversation as soon as it is over. I want to know that if I make a promise I am going to make my best effort to keep it, (or at least, have a seriously good reason as to why I let that one slide)! When I apologize I want it to be sincere, whether I meant to cause the offense or not is not the issue. (A sincere apology includes an honest and real attempt not to commit the same infraction again, and that is what I strive to do not just for today but forever.)

If we continually never follow through with our word, people will eventually stop believing anything we say. Conversely, if we live up to our word 99% of the time we will be more likely to receive acceptance and or forgiveness the 1% we mess up or let someone down.

So I guess in summing this topic up, that it is important as I am trying to be true to my word that I take time to consider my words before I say them, so as not to say something in the heat of a moment that I will regret later; or make promise, threat or statement that I know I will never carry out.

2)      Be the example I want to be…

It has often perplexed me that we can say to someone else to be one way (do or don’t do something) but we can do the exact opposite of what we are saying. Somehow, we justify this behaviour with the statement: “Do what I say and not what I do.” I never understood this logic that seems to make hypocrisy as normal as breathing. (Parents often say this to their children, not realizing that the main way children learn is by example, and so if you say something to them a hundred times while continuing to do what you don’t want them to do, they are eventually more than likely going to imitate your unwanted behaviour.)

Even as adults we are influenced greatly by our environment, which includes the people closest to us, so we should (as a race with conscious and feeling) want to bring out the best in those around us, and thereby example the best we can be for them!

In closing, I need to remember that I cannot control what other people do; think, or say…but I can control my own behaviour, thoughts and words. My choice is to not let circumstances dictate who I am, or how I behave. My goal for this coming year is to be the kind of caring and committed wife; mother; sister; friend and co-worker that I would be honoured to have in my life.

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(As a Christian, I personally gain a lot of direction and instruction from the Bible.) So for the purpose of aiming to be a better person, here are a couple of thoughts that give me strength and offer me hope. My aim is to reflect these attributes:

 ~ In His life on earth, Jesus was compassionate, loving and forgiving to all while still living truth and this is a model I am always striving to emulate with my life here on earth.

~ We are asked to do everything as if we are doing it for the Lord, Himself… and in my perception the Lord deserves nothing but the best I have, so if I do something it is worth me putting 100% effort into, no matter what or when. (This includes following through on commitments that I make.)

Thank you for listening to my journey of growth and change, (as time goes on I am sure there will be more I learn about myself). And if any of this benefits you in any way, then I am more than grateful to have been given the opportunity to share these feelings with you.